I feel a little mixed up these days.
Something about summer and it's lack of routine always throws me a little bit. Especially this summer, we've been here there and everywhere (and some of those places have been really awesome and I of course forgot my camera).
So I find I'm manic about diving into and completing some projects and I've been letting everything else go.
Manners... those have been sliding for every member of the family.
Haven't made it to the Farmer's market in 3 weeks now.
Bought and didn't make almost everything for my son's birthday party...
Ya that's right...
The cake came from box,
The soda came from cans
And there's no telling where the hot dogs came from really....
I feel that I have truly gone on vacation inside my brain a little bit and taken a respite from the work of constantly revolutionizing my life style and habits.
It's an upward climb and sometimes the constant diligence to think sustainably overwhelms me...when that happens I serve chips and juice boxes and then don't even recycle them...
This literally made two of my friends squeamish...and I don't blame them... tomorrow I may be filled with remorse over those tossed juice cartons and go dumpster diving through the garbage bag of birthday refuse to find them...
I say may be...cause this week I felt a little rebellious.
I've backslid from a lot of the platitudes for living that I've strove for this last year. For all the responsible, sustainable choices I've been trying to make I felt like I was having a harder and harder time doing it, and faking it more and more.
I got really fed up with the effort and rebelled this week, like some snotty teenager I metaphorically dyed my hair green, pierced my nose, skipped curfew and loitered behind a convenience store...the equivalent anyway.
Perhaps this next week I'll get back on track and be back to my normal self ; the "normal" me being the one that wants to start a crazy quilt this week, take my camera with me this time to visit the Antique mall, make some pastry and document the jungle of tomato plants that are finally beginning to issue forth blossoms and fruit...
Oh, I already like her so much better than the insolent beastly girl I've been this week...oh but that canned soda was delicous....and so were the chips.
Ah, it is good to be rebellious sometimes.
ReplyDeleteEnjoy the things that may not be the best for our bodies, but do wonders for our psyche.
Like eating "football food" last Saturday at an Esks game. Foot-long hot-dogs smothered in sauerkraut, jalapenos, and forbidden amounts of ketchup and mustard along with corn-dogs I know were cooked in grease and the cornmeal was certainly GMO...not to mention other nasty (tasty) morsels of junk.
It's all about the balance...and if throwing out juice box dimes gives you the breather you need, then so be it!
Thanks for the invitation to the party. I really enjoyed those hot dogs that came from who-knows-where.
-jared
I had to smile when I read this post, because like every other post, I felt as though I were listening to my own story. (Which sounds so much more enjoyable when spoken from your mouth and not mine!)
ReplyDeleteI too have been feeling this way and the guilt that comes along with it. I have to smile though and bring myself back to the Cross and think about it eternally. There are moments that my kids need me to be ok with something not environmentally ok and something that is not organic *gasp!* because I can be so stinking anal and uptight about it.
Truthfully, in the eternal spectrum of things, a soda can or some mystery meat might just be of great value!
Blessings!
Tiffany
PS. My daughter came home from a friend's house and exclaimed: "MOM!!! Do you know what?! You can BUY cookies at the STORE!!" Hmm...maybe I should buy some Oreos now and again!
Tiffany, that made me laugh out loud! love it!
ReplyDeleteHi my name is Jamie and I have been reading your blog for a little while now and I love it. I just wanted to say that most Grandmas I know that have lived to be pretty old never even knew the words organic or sustainable or recycle yet they are so loved and the wisdom they share is good and worthy... my point is just that throwing out a juice box isn't the thing that defines you. I am 100% positive if you throw out some stuff and eat some junk here and there you will still live a long life, you won't destroy the planet and your kids will be healthy. I think society has done some damage by making people feel bad and guilty even if they aren't 100% green 100% of the time... before all this "green" stuff life was still good. God Bless You! Jamie
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