Here's how it went down:
7:10 a.m. Insert folded and little bum tucked into snow white cloth diaper and velcro sealed.
Husband and I say, "awwwwwwwwwwww!" Somehow everything about Son and his bum are cuter.
7;14 Son promptly poops in new snow white diaper.
7:15 Husband helps dispose of "strange" poo in toilet. I make two mental notes:
1. Start every morning with a paper liner
2. Find out what he ate last night that could turn that color???????
7:17 Choose new sweet green diaper... say "awww" again.
Husband and I have conversation in the kitchen about how great cloth diapers will be when we get the hang of the whole poop thing. Husband reiterates his full support for my crazy ventures.
7:20 Find naked son standing on sofa... diaper is missing.
7:21 Firmly fasten son back into diaper.
7:22 I find naked son trapped under chair legs in the kitchen.
7:23 Try switching to a paper liner thinking the thinner fit may keep the diaper better fastened.
7:30 Son wets through paper liner
7:31 Son pulls of wet diaper.
7:35 I find larger size diaper and put cloth insert in again.
7:40 Nervously check on son--diaper still on
7:45 Check again -- still on
7:50 still on and dry...
7:55 Check again and realize I've never been so stressed out about a diaper before.
8:15 Start arranging a system for the diapers in Son's room. Considered taking a picture of all the sweet folded diapers in their drawer to use as a new header on the Homemade Life
8:30 I set aside all the larges diapers with the strongest velcro fasteners
8:35 I rummage through said pile for a clean diaper...again. Is it just me or does he always eliminate this much waste?
8:40 Diaper #4 of the day--Disposables always handled a couple little pees before needing to be changed. These are SOAKED.
8:41 Rethinking Photo for Header.
8:42 I realize diaper #4 is broken on one side and does not sinch in around son's leg...wonder if this will be a problem but am too lazy to try the whole re-diapering now.
8:45 Solution! I will try the new waterproof diaper cover I bought the other day!
8:46 I nearly pee my own pants laughing at poor Son who is swaddled in three layers of fabric and can hardly move his legs.
8:47 I pull myself together and remove cover
9:00 I receive phone call from friend asking if I will babysit her son and take him to his swimming class at 10:30.
No problem.
9:01 I realize this means son must go down for nap now in order to be up in time for swimming class later.
9:02-9:05 I spend three whole minutes frozen in panic of what diapering option I should put him in to sleep.
1. Diaper with cloth liner?
2. Diaper with Paper Liner
3. Diaper with two paper liners? (suggested on side of package)
9:06 I opt for Diaper with two paper liners, but debate forgoing his bottle in the hopes he might not need to pee again.
9:08 I imagine a world where baby's don't need to eliminate waste at all... smile to myself.
9:15 Small sweet son is sleeping blissfully, I close door and creep upstairs.
9:20 I start "Heavy Soil" load on already sketchy washing machine to clean the morning's offerings that have already built up.
9:21 Sketchy washing machine decides to be sketchy and stop working properly.
9:22 I lay hands on the sketchy washing machine ... not hands of blessing.
9:23 Sketchy washing machine wisely chooses not to test its mistress' patience any further.
9:30 Young Charge arrives.
9:50 Son is heard howling from his bed.
9:51 Worst fears are confirmed. Diaper has been removed and everything in bed is soaking.
9:52 I pick up a disposable diaper and consider sobbing hysterically into it...instead I get a grip, throw my shoulders back and laugh with small son who is stomping around in his crib with wet socks.
9:55 Justify putting son in disposable diaper for young charge's trip to swim class.
10:30 We barely make it in time to swim class.
11:30 Hardly thought about diapers for a whole blissful hour.
12:30 Nap times-- Son's diaper is STILL DRY!
12:31 I do a little dance and put him to bed in same diaper.
1:30 Son wakes up from nap still in disposable diaper. He's a little wet...but we're riding this sucker till it dies.
1:32 Son has absurdly large poop. Deep gratitude for the disposable diaper. Consider writing it a song.
1:33 Do I begin again with Cloth and cloth inserts?... Oh NO! All the cloth inserts are in a laundry basket in the room where young charge is sleeping....paper it is.
1:44 Not only is small son found standing on kitchen table...He is naked. Diaper is AWOL.
1:45 There will be no new blog header.
1:46 I wonder if the costs saved will be eaten up by the dental bills for the damage I've done in grinding my teeth today.
1:47 I find missing diaper, add to laundry pile and clean hallway floor.
1:48 One last brave attempt. All kid's awake, fed and son fully diapered. All are sent to the playroom.
1:50 I make a strong cup of coffee
1:52 I consider that IF the diapers fastened better and couldn't be pulled off by Houdini so easily....
2:00 I Repeat my mantra to myself " Do not let the perfect, be the enemy of the good"
Perhaps jumping in with both feet is too much of a shock to our system. Sustainable diapering is great so long as it's actually sustainable to the diaperer.
2:05 I Realize I should start another load of laundry in sketchy washing machine...not brave enough.
2:06 Kids are playing downstairs and I pour another cup of cofee...I'm in my happy place.
2:20 Son starts bellowing from playroom.
2:21 I Finish up the article on homeschooling I'm reading.
2:22 Son is still bellowing.
2:23 I start down the stairs and step on ... a soaked diaper
2:24 Naked Son is jumping on the couch.
2:26 I Clean carpet on the stairs.
2:28 Disposable diaper is fastened securely onto son with no guilt shame or regret,
Tomorrow is another day.
Pass the coffee.
Love it! That was a hilarious post! But I am sorry your diapering adventure has not gone quite as planned. If you press on with cloth diapering, you are a better woman than I! (And even though I'm writing this at 11 pm, you made me really excited for my morning coffee....and my afternoon coffee...)
ReplyDeleteOh Ashley! I laughed and nodded in agreement through this whole post....Kilmeny never pulled her diapers off but I changed her entire outfit more times then I'd like to remember. We're now using disposable solely thanks to an incredible deal on diapers and the fact that she was growing out of the cloth ones.
ReplyDeleteI'm with you on the diapers and the coffee and that tomorrow is another day! =)
Leah said Yes, another posting! I live vicariously through you! My suggestion is two words... compost and recycle. You will cut down so much on your "black" garbage (everything you can't compost or recycle) that you will feel no tinges of regret or remorse when you throw tonnes of disposable diapers away. That's what we do and I sleep great at night!
ReplyDeleteoh Ashley, this sounds all too familiar...and so not worth is for a persons mental health. Even if it did make a hilarious story for me to read.
ReplyDeleteI felt so bad about it until I though about the great marketing ploy. Where's the push for reuseable menstruation pads?? I mean, we menstruate for about 40 years versus the 2.5 spent in diapers - maybe we should all switch to re-useable pads and then we won't feel so guilty about the disposable diaper.
And just for the record, I do use re-useable pads and thoroughly enjoy it. But I'll save the details for another time.
worth 'it', not 'is'.
ReplyDeleteThanks Again for a wonderful chuckle!!!! It is midnight & after several hours of working on my computer, your blog was a delightful wind-down for a good sleep...if I don't wake up in the night laughing!!!!!!!! I admire your purpose....but somehow, I think you are a very good, frugal, Mum without "sparkly" white cloth diapers! :-)
ReplyDelete